Laura Waterhouse
Dearest blog-tastical followers!
I have found it to be the case that when embarking on a drastic life change that the journey is not only filled with cracks, deceptive reasoning and stumbling blocks, it is also ruthlessly uphill.
I know to many of you that might seem strange, one would assume, as did I, that once you had made a commitment and established a solid routine all would be a gentle glide downhill, but food is, I hate to admit, an addiction, and I don’t think there is the help that is so readily available for people who have addictions to say drugs or alcohol. I mean you can reason with a man that drugs have no natural place in his life, but food? It is vital to survival, one must eat, so it is impossible to go cold turkey…Mmmm turkey…you see? This truly is a problem!
After pondering on this mental rubix cube, I decided to look for the positives, the noticeable differences in my new life style, the things that I can now do instead of the failures I have been dwelling on recently.
So here is a tribute to my minor victory…
All ladies, at one time in life find themselves in a dingy, dirty truck stop-style rest room. It is then the time when your female spirit is truly tested. You know you want to leave, you want to turn around and try desperately to make it home, but you know you will not make it. So, despite the fact that you will never let your behind touch the seat, in fact you will not make skin contact with any part of this fortress of flushing, you lay down multiple, neatly positioned sheets of toilet paper as if somehow that will block the germs, maybe engulf them in temporary semi-dark blindness and calm their angry germ spreading aggression for the duration of your pee.
Then with the core like strength of a warrior bride you strike the position and squat.
It is on, it is the workout of your life. There can only be one winner and that winner has to be you! You use that pelvic floor and pray to God that you can break a personal record…and yet the legs begin to tremble. They begin to burn and shake and you begin to think that all is lost and you suddenly become very relieved that the ‘charmin’ shield had been laid before your quads began to fail.
Just when the heat has radiated to your kneecaps and you are shaking like a salad spinner, it is over, you have made it through, but it has been the ride of your life…and you are definitely ready to get off.
Being a larger lady, this was the normal, the sad and secret truth. Well dear bloggers, victory is indeed mine. I found myself, for reasons still unknown, forced to pee in a BP garage restroom. The ritual began and I found myself taking that huge breath in ready to face the pain, and yet, nothing! No quivering thigh muscles. To you fit people out there, this is probably not a huge achievement to boast about, but just like eating, everyone needs to pee!
So dear bloggers, this is my successful victory this week. When it seems like nothing is changing, nothing is working and nothing you do seems to count externally, revel in the small triumphs. Every squat makes a difference. What small secret bonus can you smile about today?
For me, you see, it was a pee at BP, pain free, yippee!